Ripoffs for two holidays

Oh, did you know?

Oh, did you know to obtain vaccinations?
I think that guy put salt into your drink.
Our boss is okay with six-month vacations.
And Florida is just about to sink.

Oh, did you know that Obama just got mumps?
A principal is burning down our school.
Your hair is full of ants with spotty big rumps–
April Fool!

I don’t know what to do now,

I don’t know what to do now,
What to say, how to go now,
It’s changing, it’s all changing.
On this funny day, I look in my mirror
And don’t know who I am.

I don’t know how to fight this.
I don’t know why it’s so big,
It’s  a man. It’s just a man.
And I know so many a man
In oh so many ways–
It’s not my plan.

Should I bring him down?
Should I fuss and shout?
Is all that I want
Worth talking about?
I didn’t think I’d want all this.
Now I start to doubt.

Don’t you think it’s sort of funny
That I’m stuck in this position?
It’s not fair. I always am
So calm, so cool, nobody’s tool.
Putting on a show
I’m afraid so.

I didn’t think I’d want all this
Now I start to doubt.

But, if I was told that this
Was mutual, I’d panic.
I couldn’t stand up to that fact.
I’d turn around. I’d back away.
I wouldn’t want to know.
I’m afraid so.
I want him so.
I’d miss him so.

Also, look at my links list to find a totally lipogrammatic blog. This URL has lots of cool lipograms, including an all-star squad of all-lipogram guys. Why didn’t I think of this?